IXON DUNE HP

A man has to have, among important stuff like a powerful gun, adequate ammunition, a credit card in someone else’s name and a false passport, a decent textile jacket.

Thus it is fortunate, and indeed timely, that Ixon have produced such a jacket. No, we do not know why they have named it after Frank Herbert’s iconic science-fiction novel, but it’s probably better than naming after Stephen King’s very popular Misery.

The bear has already eaten the hands and head.

We could discuss this all day, couldn’t we? But we won’t. Instead, we shall tell you what we know about Ixon’s Dune HP, and you can make your own mind up.

It’s meant as an all-season item, so there’s a removable winter-lining and you’ll also get another removable lining that is waterproof and breathes. In summer, you can jig up the flaps on the front to keep the hog-sweat off you a bit. There’s lots of pockets, inside and outside, and front and back, so you can fill them with choccy bars, ear plugs and the keys to your bike, which you’ll be convinced you’ve lost somewhere.

“Well, come on then, you hairy twat!”

The Dune is made from Noxiguard fabric with double-coated high-density weave material and re-enforced with Riplan on the shoulders, so you could fight a bear with it on. Probably. It comes with CE-Certified back, shoulder and arm protection which will force the bear to go for your throat. Happily, the reflective strip on the back will help the emergency crews find you. Eventually.

It comes in every shade of black and in sizes from small to Gee, You’re Kinda Tubby.

If we get one to try, we’ll let you know how it rolls. Just as soon as we find a bear.

RRP: $400

Look here for distributors.

About the Author

Boris is a writer who has contributed to many magazines and websites over the years, edited a couple of those things as well, and written a few books. But his most important contribution is pissing people off. He feels this is his calling in life and something he takes seriously. He also enjoys whiskey, whisky and the way girls dance on tables. And riding motorcycles. He's pretty keen on that, too.