Quick & Dirty

Published on October 2nd, 2013 | by Boris


Every weekend, legions of powerful and daring young men, kick their dirtbikes into life and sally forth to test their mettle and, sometimes, the bike’s metal as well.

Of course, when it all comes together it is a sublime dance to behold. Graceful, powerful, in control and a true vision splendid.

But when it all goes to shit, and it does quite often, because how could it not, then it is not so splendid a vision.

Or is it?

Oh, and if you’re squeamish, go look at something else.

With Ben Crank

Bit deep there. Image by Ben Crank

Sent in by Luke Middlemiss1

Fuck it. I’m outta here. Image by Luke Middlemiss

Sent in by Emma Ellery

“I’m sure there are three more in here somewhere.” Image by Emma Ellery

Sent in by Troy Danniel Green

If one closes one’s eyes, it hurts less. Image by Troy Daniel Green

Sent in by Tom Northey

We never knew they bent that way. Image by Tom Northey

Sent in by Liam Miller

He almost caught that rabbit, too. Image by Liam Miller

 Matt Bolton

Thousands of kays left. Thousands. Image by Matt Bolton

Sent in by Lewis Arragon.1

With the boot on. Image by Lewis Arragon

Sent in by Lewis Arragon

With the boot off. Image by Lewis Arragon

Sent in by Geoff Bottrell

This hole was not here last week. Image by Geoff Bottrell

With Paul Warwick

At least he’s warm. Image by Paul Warwick

Image by Luke Davis

I had that. I did. Image by Luke Davis

Sent in by Cameron Ruecroft

Appears to have missed the artery. Image by Cameron Ruecroft


Materials failure. Stop with the Kawasaki jokes, OK?

With Robert Knowles,

“Here, let me show you how to jump.” Image by Robert Knowles


No, pants would not have helped here.

Sent in by Max Fleming Mate hit a Barbwire fence.

Barbed wire meets neck power. Image by Max Fleming


What’s the bet this started with “Watch this!” Image by Levi O’Loughlin

With Dave Lopes

Needs must when the devil rides. Image by Dave Lopes

Sent in by Leyne Ryder.

“It’ll be fine, babe. We’ll just go up here a bit.” Image by Leyne Ryder


“This is one I broke a long time ago.”

Sent in by Nick Hosking.

Ouch. Just fucken ouch. Image by Nick Hosking


Hello, tree. You’re hard.

Sent in by Glenn Baldwin The mark on the tree is where he hit

Tree one. Katoom zero. Image by Steve Baldwin

Sent in by David Mills

Who hates it when this happens?

Sent in by Lauren Freeman

Thank God it was the light one.

Sent in by Jarrod Jrd Lake

That last jump was big. Image by Jarrod Lake

Want more? Of course you do. Go to Dirt Bike Fuckups on Facebook.

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About the Author

is a writer who has contributed to many magazines and websites over the years, edited a couple of those things as well, and written a few books. But his most important contribution is pissing people off. He feels this is his calling in life and something he takes seriously. He also enjoys whiskey, whisky and the way girls dance on tables. And riding motorcycles. He's pretty keen on that, too.

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