Published on February 3rd, 2014 | by Al


I note that the Brisbane Times (January 20, 2014) has reported that the October and November figures covering the Queensland government’s “War on Bikies” are in.

Apparently, 73,309 offences were reported in October and November 2013. Bikies accounted for 1% of these offences.


Has anyone missed the elephant in the room?

Non-bikies committed 99% of the offences in the two month period!

The Vicious Lawless Association Disestablishment Act was supposed to stop this, and apparently, it isn’t working.

This occupied the minds of the Supreme Riding Soviet of the People’s Republic of BIKE ME! for, well, some seconds at their last meeting.

It was noted that the Schedule to the Vicious Lawless Association Disestablishment Act included the Bandidos, Black Uhlans, Coffin Cheaters, Comancheros, Finks, Fourth Reich, Gladiators, Gypsy Jokers, Hells Angels, Highway 61, Iron Horsemen, Life and Death, Lone Wolf, Mobshitters, Mongols, Muslim Brotherhood Movement, Nomads, Notorious, Odins Warriors, Outcasts, Outlaws, Phoenix, Rebels, Red Devils, Renegades, Scorpions and Wiggles.

We called for some more red wine, and some more of that lamb with the toum and homous and baba ghanouj and bread, and some of those salted chillis; and decided that the best thing would be to lock up anyone who WASN’T a member of the organizations on the list, deny them bail, and impose minimum sentences on them of say, fifteen years. That should fix 99% of the crime.

Not hard, Campbell Newman. You listening, Jarrod? Ah well, probably past his bedtime anyway.

So, we drank some more of that red wine, and ate some more of that lamb and pureed garlic dip thing, and decided that our plan, while sound, needed a small modification. Queensland style.

Screw the Muslim Brotherhood Movement, we decided.


Initially, we weren’t sure, so we put it to the vote.

It was.


About the Author

Al does a bit of everything, and likes hanging around with Boris, because there are generally motorcycles and whiskey, and because hilarity generally ensues. He wastes his spare time not moderating the BIKE ME! forums, where he posts occasionally and is regarded as unfair, unbalanced and unmedicated. Shows how much THEY know.

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