Published on October 18th, 2019 | by Boris



I know this may come as a surprise, but there are times when I go for a ride and it’s not a death race with police sirens howling in the background. I dress accordingly.

Alpine Stars call it ‘Urban’; I call it going to the shops for beer, or taking a young lady home after serenading her on a guitar all night. And you’re right, I don’t play guitar. But let’s move on, shall we?

A man does not ever need to have anything brown in his motorcycle-apparel bin. But, and this is a big ‘but’, he may want something brown.

It smells like teen Urban. This is not a bad thing.

The reasons for this wanting are his and his alone – and I will not sit in judgement upon him. In fact, I will advise him that if his desire for brown is all-encompassing, then he should maybe address himself to these Crazy Eight short gloves – which, colour aside, are to hell and gone better in an accident than his mum’s rose-pruning jobbies or a pair of roping gloves he bought in Tamworth because he was drunk and wanted to join the rodeo circuit.

Why are they better? Protection in case of something terrible happening, of course.

They are padded on the heel of the hand, and re-enforced along the thumb joint. They are fully perforated so they’re a summery thing, and because I well understand the needs of young Urbans, the pointy finger is iPhone compatible. It will work on any screen, so there’s no need to take off your glove, drop it in the gutter, and then get run over by a truck when you’re looking for it. See? Total safety.

And because these brown marvels are redeemed by artful applications of black leather, you don’t have to be totally Urban to wear them.

Note the re-enforced stitching everywhere.

I can rock them because I am heavily tattooed in the Old School way, and I have a beard far more evil than it is fluffy and welcoming. You may need to up your game in that area.

But seriously, these are pretty good on those days when you’re just not about getting all your race gear on. The pace will be gentle (maybe because you’re unwell, or getting in touch with your avocado chakra), and if an oopsie happens it won’t be one of those 220km/h gravel-sprayers.

I like them, and if I wear them long enough, they may fade from brown to some indistinct and very cool-looking earth-based colour, because my beard ain’t never going to be fluffy.


RRP: $139.95


WHERE CAN I GET IT FROM? Check the Monza Imports website HERE for your nearest dealer.


Tags: , , ,

About the Author

is a writer who has contributed to many magazines and websites over the years, edited a couple of those things as well, and written a few books. But his most important contribution is pissing people off. He feels this is his calling in life and something he takes seriously. He also enjoys whiskey, whisky and the way girls dance on tables. And riding motorcycles. He's pretty keen on that, too.

Back to Top ↑
  • Zero May 2024
  • Dear George M-Rec
    BIKE ME! Forum
    BIKE ME! Beer Fund
    BIKE ME! Tumblr