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Published on March 25th, 2016 | by Boris

2016 BANKSTOWN BIKE SHOW – STILL SHINING

For 26 years, I have eschewed the ancient Egyptian celebration of Horus’ death and subsequent zombification, and gone to Bankstown in Sydney’s southwest instead.

For in Bankstown, there is the Good Friday custom bike show. And there I may take my ease, gaze upon amazing metal creations, and if I am so moved, drink beer.

Golden brown, texture like sun…

I loved this. It was special.

No. It’s not a Kawasaki.

It’s good to be the king of paint

Drinking beer was not such a good an idea this year. The NSW Police Force was deep in the throes of Operation Righteous Bastard, and was eagerly stopping, swabbing, breathalysing, and defecting everything on two wheels, pretty much everywhere in NSW.

And yes, they bung it on outside the bike show, but once again, my friends and I sailed through unscathed. Timing, pilgrims. It’s always and forever about timing.

Inside, and safe from the police cash-registers, is a feast of customised hardware. Each year, the bike-builders somehow up their game, and produce bikes and paintjobs that defy description. This year the crazy purple Evo that won everything last year returned, probably to gloat, but there was some stiff competition.

It comes with its own blanket.

Fut-fut-fut-fut…

Now we’re customising…

…with crocodiles!

I was very pleased to also see Adam Layton from APL Performance. Adam is the best Harley and Victory tuner in the country, and each year he brings his dyno out and lets people have a run to see if they can back their bragging up. This year, he also brought his top fueler. And because I am a professional, I got my iPhone out and videoed him starting it. Shortly afterward, I was clinically blind from nitrous fumes and stumbling and weeping through the decorative garden next to the Turkish ladies cooking gozleme. This is not the first time those ladies have seen me do this. They are very cool ladies.

Every year, Hard’n’Fast Promotions fills its allotted space at the Bankstown trotting track with everything from Matt Mingay’s stunt show and flat-track racing, to medieval battles (seriously), hot chicks, great bands, a snake show, stalls, and of course the custom bikes. The SES gets all the money the promoters raise from the bike show entries, and in terms of worthy causes, this is a great one.

For long-time goers like me, it’s a great chance to catch up with old mates, many of whom look substantially older than what they did when we all first started going in 1990, but there’s no denying we’re all still pretty damn sexy.

Sorry for missing your zombie-thing again, Horus. But motorcycles just sing to me. It must be because they are bright and shiny and noisy.

Yeah, that’s it.
Here’s the rest of the pics…

Give me a hill.

This took a bit of masking.

Last year’s winner was back.

It’s incredible.

Just incredible.

Um…yeah.

Would make a great wedding vehicle

Look at this.

Lots of VRODs. This was a nice one.

Fabulous Knuckle

There is no substitute for cubes

At least it’s pure

I could so rock this.

Sure, you can bring your Jap bike…

…just make it fat

Adam Layton’s fueller

I want to get Adam involved with the Magnum

The Mingay stare

Smoke then if you got them

All class

Just a quick family pic before we beat each other with axes

Tags: Bike Porn, Events, Motorcycle Art

About the Author

Boris is a writer who has contributed to many magazines and websites over the years, edited a couple of those things as well, and written a few books. But his most important contribution is pissing people off. He feels this is his calling in life and something he takes seriously. He also enjoys whiskey, whisky and the way girls dance on tables. And riding motorcycles. He's pretty keen on that, too.