I took the FJR back to Boris\u2019s place on the Monday.\u00a0 I told him the traffic from his Dear George columns wasn\u2019t crashing the web site so much.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat is because the traffic came from Facebook\u201d, he told me, \u201cand I have been banned from Facebook for a month.\u201d<\/p>\n
Apparently some humourless Indian had complained about one of the columns, and Facebook decided he needed to be Taught a Lesson.<\/p>\n
\u201cTo be fair\u201d, I said, \u201cyou have to look at it from his side.<\/p>\n
\u201cImagine being this Indian guy. You wake up to the screams of the women being gang raped. You say a prayer to your blue two headed rhino god.\u00a0 You don\u2019t have a shower, so you bathe in the sewage filled river and almost choke on a child\u2019s spinal column.\u00a0 You ride on the roof of the train to the call centre. You spend the day on the phone. \u2018Hi this is Pajeet from Microsoft, we have found out your computer has a virus <click>\u2019.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou spend your lunch time stalking Englishwomen on the Internet. Walking home you have to take a crap for the fifteenth time that day. You squat over a dying orphan who happens to be in the way. You wipe your butt with your hand. You have rice grown in nightsoil from a communal bowl for dinner and it\u2019s time for bed. You curl up in your pile of straw and give a prayer of thanks to your five-armed lobster-woman god for allowing you to live in the greatest country on earth.<\/p>\n
\u201cThen you have a quick browse with your phone and find some Australian has written rude stories about the MotoGP.<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course you are going to complain to the Zuck that his ideas of acceptable behaviour are far too broad and are making the World Wide Web not a nice place.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI guess you are\u201d, said Boris.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt could be worse\u201d, I said. \u201cLook on the bright side. Imagine you were one of those German chicks that got banned from Facebook for complaining that they were raped by refugees. You may be banned from Facebook, but you haven\u2019t been raped by Afghans.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re right, of course, Al\u201d, he said. \u201cAnd it\u2019s not as if I don\u2019t have other stuff to do for a month.\u201d<\/p>\n
Of course I was right. And I just knew his next Royal Enfield review was going to be hilarious.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\u201cIt could be worse\u201d, I said. \u201cLook on the bright side.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":401601,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[48],"tags":[221],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/401431"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=401431"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/401431\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":402597,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/401431\/revisions\/402597"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/401601"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=401431"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=401431"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=401431"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}