{"id":323571,"date":"2017-02-16T13:25:03","date_gmt":"2017-02-16T03:25:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/bikeme.tv\/?p=323571"},"modified":"2017-04-09T13:31:52","modified_gmt":"2017-04-09T03:31:52","slug":"dear-mr-dalligna-matthias-can-call-herr-muller","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/dear-mr-dalligna-matthias-can-call-herr-muller\/","title":{"rendered":"“Dear Mr Dall’Igna, Matthias here. You can call me Herr M\u00fcller”"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dear Mr Dall’Igna,<\/p>\n

Matthias here. You can call me Herr M\u00fcller.<\/p>\n

I have just been handed today’s final timesheet for MotoGP Practice in Austria.<\/p>\n

\n

Firstly, I did not know there were islands in Austria, but then I didn’t know we were telling fibs about our car emissions either.<\/p>\n

Now I don’t know much about this motorcycle racing business, but I would imagine this Spanish fellow we paid all that money for should be somewhere north of 15th.<\/p>\n

Correct me if I have this wrong. Actually, no. Don’t say anything. It’s better when Italians don’t speak.<\/p>\n

The problem is that while I am CEO, I do in fact have to explain myself to the Accountants, or Buchhalters as they prefer to be known.<\/p>\n

And if you think I am sour and humourless, you should see Dietrich the Buchhalter OberFuhrer. I’m pretty sure he keeps frozen puppy carcasses in his freezer for lollipops.<\/p>\n

Dietrich is not happy with this George fellow being 15th.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\"Dear<\/p>\n

\"Dear<\/p>\n

\n

And because Dietrich is not happy, I am not happy.<\/p>\n

I don’t expect you’re happy at the moment either.<\/p>\n

There will be no happiness at all until this situation improves dramatically.<\/p>\n

And when I find out who this Hammer and Butter character is who keeps sending me Instagram pictures of his Spartan cape, I will ban happiness altogether forever.<\/p>\n

I trust I have made myself clear.<\/p>\n

Yours faithfully,<\/p>\n

Matthias M\u00fcller
\nCEO Volkswagen AG
\nWolfsburg, Germany<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Mr Dall’Igna, Matthias here. You can call me Herr M\u00fcller. I have just been handed today’s final timesheet for MotoGP Practice in Austria. Firstly, I did not know there were islands in Austria, but then I didn’t know we were telling fibs about our car emissions either. Now I don’t know much about this [&hellip<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":169,"featured_media":323577,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[252],"tags":[219,256,67,61,100,24,49,8],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323571"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/169"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=323571"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323571\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":323621,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323571\/revisions\/323621"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/323577"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=323571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=323571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=323571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}