{"id":323215,"date":"2017-02-13T12:34:07","date_gmt":"2017-02-13T02:34:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/bikeme.tv\/?p=323215"},"modified":"2017-04-09T12:41:39","modified_gmt":"2017-04-09T02:41:39","slug":"let-first-welcome-beautiful-city-sydney","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/let-first-welcome-beautiful-city-sydney\/","title":{"rendered":"“Let me first welcome you to the beautiful city of Sydney”"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Dear George,<\/p>\n

Let me first welcome you to the beautiful city of Sydney and let you know how proud we are to have you here.<\/p>\n

I have spoken to the city council and unfortunately we are unable to hang a banner from the Sydney Harbour Bridge with \u2018Rossi is a puta\u2019 written on it.<\/p>\n

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We are, however, in a position to fly your Lorenzo Land flag from the top of the bridge, but we cannot fly the one you\u2019ve supplied because it is 300 metres by 200 metres and the flagpole just isn\u2019t designed for that kind of load.<\/p>\n

We are actively considering your request to let you ride across the bridge in a chariot drawn by 16 white horses with a convoy of transport vehicles behind you carrying every bike you\u2019ve ever ridden, but we simply don\u2019t have that many white horses. I can, however, organise 16 sleek bicycle riders from the Death To All Cars lobby.<\/p>\n

However, I cannot allow you to brandish a spear during the parade, and while I understand it is legal under the Spartan Law you have invoked, I do have to remind you that this is not Sparta.<\/p>\n

I also regret to inform you that we cannot seal off Bondi Beach for you to swim privately. You may have noticed it is quite warm in Sydney at the moment and while it\u2019s very generous of you to say you will allow only \u2018very beautiful girls\u2019 onto the sand to watch you bathe, it\u2019s not something I think I can convince our rate-payers to swallow.<\/p>\n

I would also like to thank you for your very kind offer to visit the fireground where our heroic Rural Fire Service is fighting our seasonal bushfires, to provide stirring motivational speeches in Spanish to the afflicted residents, encouraging them not to give up, and to keep fighting until the last ember is extinguished, much as you did last year during the race season.<\/p>\n

We have also checked our records and made inquiries with the NSW Police Force, ASIO and Interpol and we have no record of anyone called \u201cJonas Fucking Folger\u201d, so I cannot help you in that regard.<\/p>\n

I wish you every success in the forthcoming MotoGP season and trust your testing in Phillip Island will go well. And no, Gigi has not told me what is in the box behind your seat, but I\u2019m sure that whatever it is, it is perfectly legal and within the rules.<\/p>\n

Yours faithfully,<\/p>\n

The Hon Clover Moore
\nMayor of Sydney<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear George, Let me first welcome you to the beautiful city of Sydney and let you know how proud we are to have you here. I have spoken to the city council and unfortunately we are unable to hang a banner from the Sydney Harbour Bridge with \u2018Rossi is a puta\u2019 written on it. We [&hellip<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":323226,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[252],"tags":[219,256,67,61,100,24],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323215"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=323215"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323215\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":323254,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323215\/revisions\/323254"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/323226"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=323215"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=323215"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bikeme.tv\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=323215"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}