I crested the last hill before home on the VFR and saw the police cars parked outside. They often put a Random Breath Testing station there. It is damnably inconvenient.<\/p>\n
I turned left to go around the block, but there was a police car there too. They signalled me to stop, and I took off my helmet, and they asked me if I had had any alcohol to drink today, and I said no, and they put a machine near my mouth and asked me to count to ten and I did, and I put my helmet on and rode around the block to home.<\/p>\n
\u201cRandom Breath Testing is a damnable invasion of civil liberties,\u201d I said at the dinner table that night. \u201cNo-one would accept that it is okay to stop citizens at random and go through their pockets under a Random Pickpocket Testing \u00a0scheme, or take samples from their underwear under a Random Rapist Testing scheme, but somehow Random Breath Testing is accepted as being okay. When I am dictator it will be illegal for the police to stop anyone unless they have reasonable grounds to suspect they have committed a crime.\u201d<\/p>\n
The girl-child looked troubled. The wife rolled her eyes.<\/p>\n
I went to lunch with a few of the guys from work the next day. One was complaining about the Safe Schools Coalition. For those readers not in Australia, this is a bunch of Marxists trying to change the school curriculum to get eleven year olds to talk to their teachers about their genitals on the grounds that 15.7% of the kids are lesbians or transsexuals or something. It would be called \u201cgrooming\u201d if anyone else did it.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhen I am dictator\u201d, I said, \u201cI will fire the lot of them and put their names on the sex offender\u2019s register.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks Al\u201d, he said. \u201cThat makes me feel better.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBloody Marxists\u201d, I said. \u201cYou do know that they are named after the unfunny one?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cZeppo?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCorrect.\u201d<\/p>\n
I missed the lights at the downhill right turn on the way home. The car in front of me deferred at length to two bicyclists struggling up the hill towards us. A law has been recently passed making it illegal to go within a metre of them, and it has made a lot of people very wary.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhen I am dictator,\u201d I announced at the dinner table, \u201cit will be legal for all licenced shooters to hunt bicyclists.\u201d<\/p>\n
The girl-child was appalled. \u201cThat\u2019s terrible, Dad\u201d, she said. \u201cThat\u2019s murder.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, no, no\u201d, I said. \u201cYou have me all wrong. Only with tranquilliser guns, of course. I\u2019m not a MONSTER.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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