\u201cYou must come out with us on Sunday,\u201d said Boris. \u201cWe are going to the Serbian hunting club barbecue.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cI told you\u201d, he said. \u201cYou are an honorary wog. You must come.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI think I have something on that day,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n
\u201cHorsecock,\u201d said Boris. \u201cThe wog is strong in you. You will be coming.\u201d<\/p>\n
And it came to pass that on the Sunday I did ride my V-Strom\u00a0to Long Dan\u2019s place, and Long Dan and Boon and Boris and I did ride to the Serbian hunting club\u2019s barbecue.<\/p>\n
We were early. We parked our bikes near a covered picnic table. The Serbs are High Energy. We walked towards the food. A vendor of Russian and German steel stopped us and showed us his knives for sale. A vendor of leather sold me a sling for one of my hunting rifles. \u201cIt is the same leather that Gucci use,\u201d he told me. \u201cFifty bucks. I swear they cost me that. I am not making a cent on this.\u201d<\/p>\n
We stopped where a man was barbecuing quails. He gave us quails on bread rolls. He didn\u2019t want money. We walked past two bullocks turning on spits. A bit further along was a bar. Boris bought Heinekens for everyone.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s um, ten am,\u201d I told him.<\/p>\n
\u201cIndeed\u201d, said Boris.<\/p>\n
We finished the second Heineken around 10:30. Boon bought a round of rakija. There were lots of people — maybe three, four hundred. We went for a walk and looked at the hunting vehicles and then queued near a bullock on a spit for some food. The guy didn\u2019t want money. We took beef and salad and bread back to our picnic table and ate it. Someone bought another Heineken. It might have been me. A guy on an old BMW R75 turned up and parked his bike near ours.<\/p>\n
Two old ladies asked if they could touch the bikes. We said yes, and one of them stood next to my V-Strom and held the handlebars and the other took her photo. Some young girls in national costume walked past. I looked at Boris enquiringly.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey will dance for us later\u201d, he said.<\/p>\n
The guys who were still hungry went and got some venison stew.<\/p>\n
An orthodox priest got out of a car and walked past our table towards the food. \u201cAh yes\u201d, said Boris. \u201cThere\u2019s always a priest.\u201d<\/p>\n
I reached for my smartphone. \u201cIs it rude to take his photo?\u201d I asked, because I am a culturally sensitive person.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, that’s fine,\u201d said Boris, \u201cbut he will probably want to come over and bless us.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell\u201d, I said. \u201cI will ask him to come over and bless us, and I will take his photo while he is doing it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou can\u2019t do that\u201d, said Boris. \u201cIt\u2019s rude.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy is that rude?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cFor Christ\u2019s sake, Al\u201d, said Boris. \u201cCan\u2019t you see he\u2019s in the middle of a phone call?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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